unconditional love

Unconditional love. It's a mother's love. It's a feeling so strong, you can't even describe it.

march break

This past week was March Break around here... which doesn't mean a whole lot to Phebe, who isn't in school, but she sure was happy to have her sister around all week! We had a fabulous week. It was busy busy busy. But today, I'm so ready for a Mom break!

We fed the birds out of our hands, we went to IKEA and the girls had fun in småland and face painting, we went to the Canadian Museum of Civilization & Children's Museum, we went to the IMAX to see 'The Last Reef', we went to McDonald's play area and we went to the swimming pool (I had the drag the girls our, they were in there for 3 hours!).

The girls were SO happy and by the time Friday rolled around, my husband was even commenting on Phebe having a brand new glow of happiness about her. I think the swimming pool did that - the girl LOVES the water, as does Lilah! It sure was a fun week.

I didn't take my camera along to document everything. However, I did bring it to the Children's Museum, since it was our first time there, definitely not our last! The children's museum has lots of different scenes and activities in different countries, kinda like Epcot at Disney World, although on a much smaller scale! On the way in, the girls were given a passport that they could stamp (themselves) at each activity and country they visited. So neat.

Lilah's favourite part was being a post mistress in the post office, she could have stayed there all day long. And Phebe, well she loved driving the bus... and getting lost! It seemed like I spent 60% of the time searching for her!

The IMAX theatre is in the same building as the museum, which is nice. The girls LOVED 'The Last Reef' show, and with the 3D effect you could even reach out and think you were touching the fish. Phebe was so intrigued! She did complain about her belly hurting a few times, I think she felt a little motion sickness - so I just put my hands over her eyes a few times to help get her grounded!

[ the flickr set is here ]

sickness... and a surgery date

My little Phebe girl is sick again.

What starts out as a simple cold so quickly escalates into a deep chest infection. Today she woke up from her nap feverish and throwing up. I got an emergency appointment with our GP - so thankful for amazing medical care. She is on antibiotics again, 3 antibiotics in the past 3 months - that ratio is a little unsettling for this Mama. But unfortunately for Phebe and her heart condition, medicating her is needed right now to take every precaution necessary - even though the doctors admit that they are probably overmedicating her.

Through all of this, I'm just so thankful for Phebe's attitude during sickness, nothing gets our happy girl down. Our little sweetness has lived with this kind of sickness since she was born (we know this from the medical papers we got at referral) and she really doesn't know any different. Sometimes I wonder how much care did she get when she was sick in the orphanage? It's such a hard place for my mind and heart to go.

But here's the good news. God knew I needed this call today. The (Cardiovascular Surgery) nurse called this morning and my baby girl now has a date for surgery - May 30th, all being well. Yes, that is the day she'll be getting her little 5mm hole closed up and it'll be like a fresh new beginning for that little heart of hers. I so want my girly to be healthy and to live her life with less sickness. Of course, I'm human too, I'm worried and emotional at the idea of my tiny girl going through this surgery.

But my Father in Heaven, He gives me strength in my weakness. Today, he gave me this passage, how He knew I would need it...

"He healeth the broken in heart, and bindeth up their wounds" (Psalm 147:3)
"He telleth the number of the stars; He calleth them all by their names" (Psalm 147:4)
"Great is our Lord, and of great power: His understanding is infinite" (Psalm 147:5).

How great is our Lord! He is going to heal our beautiful little girl's (broken) heart and bring her comfort and healing. Not only does He know each of the countless stars by name, but each one of us by name too, including our little Phebe. How incredible is our God! His power and His understanding is something I can lean on, not only in my moments of weakness, not only in this life, but throughout eternity. He'll draw near.

tigger x 2

Face painting at IKEA today!
When the lady was painting her face, she kept say "Mama tickle, Mama tickle, Mama tickle!"
Of course, she loved the end result!

six months ago today

It's been six months since Phebe joined our family. Half a year! I basically have no words to describe how quickly that time has disappeared.

It seems like yesterday that we walked into that room in Changsha and immediately saw our little girl sitting on that wooden bench, all alone. She had so much fear in her eyes; it literally took my breath away. I still remember that sob catching in my throat.

And knowing the happy carefree girl she is today, I now realize how much stress and anxiety that day, and a couple of weeks after, had on her little soul. It is heartbreaking for me to even think back to those memories.

Like I mentioned, in some ways it seems like yesterday, but on the other hand, looking back through these pictures, wow, it's like our sweet little girl has been with us a lifetime. Phebe, even though she's been through a huge turmoil in her little life, really hasn't looked back - in almost every moment, she embraces happiness and lives her happiness out loud! The selfish part of me is relieved that she has moved on so quickly and yet, a large part of me is torn with sadness, to watch how strong she had to be at such a tender age, in order to move on so quickly.

Her smiles in each of these pictures, puts tears in my eyes. She is so loved.

one year referral anniversary

One year ago today, we stood, shaking with excitment, listening to a voice message that basically told us we would be parents again!

Since it was a Sunday evening and no one is in the (Children's Bridge) office on Sunday and files can't be brought home by the coordinator, we had to wait until the Monday to see her sweet little face! Our adoption coordinator - Cathy - drove over to our home the next morning, even though it was her day off, to deliver the package and pictures of our new little girl.

I can still remember Cathy saying to us: "I looked at this little girl, standing in her leopard print coat and I knew this was your daughter, Jill!" I guess she knows me and my love for cute kids clothes pretty well! Indeed, it was love at first sight! A day I'll remember for the rest of my life... the butterflies, the excitement, the tears of joy and the prayers of thankfulness.

And let me tell you, this girl has changed our life - she is one of the happiest girls I know. Always smiling, always funny and generally quite silly! In fact, just today she stuck a whole chicken nugget into her mouth, it was half hanging out because of the sheer size of it, along with her big ole grin! Then she pulled it back out and exclaimed: "Bebe rascal!" (Phebe rascal) Oh yes, she is all that, a rascal on so many levels! But she has this way about her, you just can't help but grin at her funny little self. She is beautiful and silly and sweet.

I'm so thankful God guided us to her and brought us together. Truly. She is one of the greatest gifts we've ever been given.

We love you Phebe Jayne. You make our hearts swell.

toilet training

Toilet training is definitely not the easiest task in the world.

We were told by Phebe's caregivers, in China, that they had started toilet training her. However, because of her grief and the language barrier, we made the decision to hold off on training her for a while. That being said, every night before bedtime we would put Phebe on the potty and she always knew what she was supposed to do! She most definitely liked the praise that came along with it!

Her language and communication is amazing now, in fact, she is now stringing three to four words together and can say:

"Pee-pee IN toilet" & "No pee-pee in panties"

My husband and I tend to say this a lot about our Phebe girl - she has the theory perfect, now if she could put that theory into practice...!

So, on Monday morning I bit the bullet, so to speak, and let her wear a pair of big girl panties! She has done amazing! Only one accident in the whole week, and that accident was during her nap one day. So yes, she's doing fabulous. However, she never ever tells me when she needs to go pee-pee, nope, I am always the one asking her. It's probably my own fault, I should let her figure it out, but mostly it's just because I don't want to do another load of laundry or her to pee on the couch! Or maybe it would be just too embarrasing if she did her pee-pee while sitting on the dentist's chair, or during music lesson, or while grocery shopping, or at the Science & Technology Museum! Now you know what we were up to this week! And now you know why I am constantly asking - I'm just saving both of us myself from the embarrassment!

Anyway, every single time I ask: "Phebe, do you need to go pee-pee?"... she replies: "Go pee-pee!" and runs to the toilet! She may only have 2 drips on some occasions, but she can always squeak something out. Ha! How I love her enthusiasm!

I'm hopeful that my constant nagging questioning and our hourly routine will get her to the right place... soon!

Go Phebe! We're so proud of you!

my three loves

Last night, I ran downstairs to grab my camera and capture this moment.
My three loves all sitting enjoying some pre-bedtime songs on YouTube.
These are the moments I want to remember, forever.

2013 in pictures ~ february

harry potter, move over
cayo coco, cuba
chinese new year
beach walk
family day at winterlude
stripey legs
strolling down the boardwalk
sister love

those glasses!

Move over Harry (Potter), there's a Harriette in town! ...and she is ridiculously cute.

Most days, she'll grab a pair of glasses from the dress-up box and wear them around the house.
You see, her big sister wears glasses and she likes to act just like her big sister!

新年快乐 - xīn nián kuài lè - happy new year!

I know this is a little late... we happened to be in Cuba this year for Chinese New Year! I'd packed the girl's Chinese dresses and they wore them to dinner that evening, gaining many compliments from the staff and other tourists. There was even Spring Rolls at the buffet to celebrate the occasion! Although I don't think that was totally planned!

Call me vain, but I had actually imagined this wonderful beach photoshoot in my head, with the girls all snazzy in their Chinese dresses... but the many long days at the beach had made us all quite tired, so much so that we napped right through that glorious photo opportunity! My excuse - it got dark earlier than I anticipated! Oh well, sleep, and as a result, happy girls, makes the vacation much nicer than grumpy girls and photoshoots! ...just sayin!

But don't they look the picture of happiness and joy in this picture?! I admit, I do have to act quite silly for these grins! But it's SO worth it!

Xīn Nián Kuài Lè! Happy New Year my friends!

little stripey legs are simply irresistible!

I just love stripes.
Especially stripey legs.
ESPECIALLY when they're jumping on the bed!

There's no greater joy than that!

[ the flickr set is here ]